I miss his friendship – not sure what to do

Hi Dr. Patty Ann,
I like this boy and he likes me, or at least I think so. The thing is I know him through my friend, a girl. He told her he likes me and has a soft spot for me. We (I and the boy) used to talk a lot, he made me smile. He always throws hints like “I care about you” “we would be good as a couple” and stuff. He used to peck me on my nose, cheek and eyelids. Then it was almost like my friend (the girl) was jealous, I didn’t really understand. You see they are like best friends but she has a boyfriend, two even. The boy I like told me something & said I shouldn’t tell my friend. He sent it in a text which she saw and got mad at me for. She started acting weird and we stopped talking. I was still talking to the boy, he was trying to get both of us to talk. We finally did and she said she wasn’t talking to me cause of the way I am with B (the boy I like), that it’s like I’m throwing myself at him; guys like girls with attitude, that it’s almost as if I’m the one coming onto him, that B told her me & him almost kissed (which we did not) and that he said he doesn’t want a relationship and he doesn’t come to her room when I come over because I’m there. So I stopped talking to B like I used to. Then he brought a girl over to stay the night. He asked my friend if I was jealous about it because he felt I acted weird. After like a week, he came and said don’t I miss him? Why did I stop talking to him? Don’t I feel like things are awkward? I just played dumb. He came back later & was bugging me telling me he misses me and was it cause he brought someone over? He said we need to talk and I said we don’t. The next day we were at a BBQ party and he asked if I was having fun, and tried to hug me. I hugged him back and he said “but that’s not how you normally hug┬áme.” Now it’s so weird between us, but I don’t know what to do. What if my friend lied about what he said? Or exaggerated? I miss him, it’s not even really about the relationship anymore, I miss his friendship. We go to the same university but he’s going to a different city for summer. I don’t know. Should I talk to him? I’m just confused.
– Confused in Abbotsford

Dear Confused,
YES – you should talk to the boy you like in a real, face-to-face conversation. None of this texting, emailing, IMing stuff. You will never know the truth about what this boy feels about you unless you ask him directly.

Good luck!


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